It has been a long 3 plus years we’ve been a foster family, and the experience has been so unique and challenging I’ve actually committed to writing a book about it!
And I’m THRILLED to say that all is coming to an end this week!
Because we are FINALLY ADOPTING!!
Visiting the Fort Wayne children's zoo in early 2022 as a foster family
When I reflect on those three years, I am incredibly grateful we continued on each time we questioned if this was what we were meant to do. We had a lot of ups and downs, lots of moments where my husband or I would look at each other and just ask “Are we prepared to keep going? Can we afford to keep going? We aren’t even trained to do this!”
And I’m so glad God continued to step in & show us the way… needs met, prayers answered, each time something would affirm we were to keep going!
And I’ve not really shared this before, but we actually thought we’d be adopting them back in Spring of 2021, because their birth parents signed adoption consent at a court hearing… but then the parents changed their stance, an interim judge allowed legal proceedings without really understanding how they would play out and last year we had to actually hire legal experts to get the adoptions finally back on track.
We often hike, because in addition to it being great exercise, we’ve found it really helps us work through trauma & learn to work together.
We were very pro-family when we started, because that’s the main goal of fostering… the kids go back home to a safe place, where the concerns for removal were remedied. Unfortunately that never happened for our kids & their siblings, and even when it became clear their best chance for a safe, steady home was where they were, the state still had their eye on pushing them back into a home that was not safe or prepared for their needs.
We spent a LOT of sleepless nights from the time we learned the judge basically charged us with proceeding with contested adoptions until we actually started the process. We prayed for a week, and all the foster families had peace we were making the right decision, and now, we can see the worth. After years stuck in a system that only focuses on sending kids home, regardless of safety, they stayed right where they were (in their foster homes) and now all really will have safe, permanent, loving homes!
No matter how they’ve arrived in this family, biological, fostered, adopted, they all definitely keep us on our toes!
There are a LOT of feelings that come with adoption… I’ve felt a range of things since learning they will become “ours”… I’m tired because its been so long, I’m disappointed because this isn’t what was “supposed” to happen, I’m thrilled because we are finally giving the kids what they need- permanency! And so many other things…
Today I’ll choose to be happy, because it’s really only making official what we knew from the moment they both came through the door- they are family!
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